I guess many of us are stumped by the above question in certain times of our lives. Sadly, but realistically I personally felt that just like Marketing, there isn't a right or wrong answer, it's a matter how you prove your case. Some people answer it base on conscience, some on moral while some base on some facts. Whatever your rationale will be, I would say, you just have to be true to yourself cause at the end of the day, you are answerable for the outcome and to yourself only. I kinda like this question as it allows me to stretch my imagination as it can be a question, asking me about my hopes and dreams or my conscience or better still my mental state of mind when faced with an issue. So basically, it sets me thinking and also acts as a form of check and balance in my daily life.
So why this topic today? It spun off from my lousy Monday yesterday. Some of you had heard me grumble about it in Facebook but those are just far from the truth.
Well the story goes like this: More than 2 months ago, I was asked if the team needed help in the workplace from a referral from MCYS, knowing the nature and background and not being heartless like the govt is in the Yellow Ribbon project, I sticked out my neck and say why not when my peers think otherwise. I certainly knows the risks and backbreaking tasks of mentoring a very young problem child (literally speaking) but just like my boss's firm believe of giving others a 2nd chance, we went ahead with it. Things were okay in the beginning, with just minor concentration and tardiness issues but in general I think she just needed more guidance since we all felt that we had a very bright kid here. However, things start to get too close for comfort as we learnt more things about her in Facebook and also some of the things that she blurted out during conversations. She is constantly late for work and the tardiness even showed in her dressing and at meetings where she will either yawn openly or lay her head on the table. My peers dispel that she was still young and we all agreed she just have too much personal problems that is weighing her down. But despite a couple of counselling sessions, she only paid lip service and my fellow colleague which I shared the responsibility in supervising was of no help as she will often kept quiet during such sessions. The tardiness is now also in the way she perform her duties and work, not forgetting she will regularly be on urgent leave due to problems at home or medical appointments. No professional courtesy was extended by her cause we were only notified that very morning and leave forms covering these urgent absences were always late or had to be chased. I must say, it was a real mess. The mother got in touch with me thru Facebook and not wanting to be seen as invading one's privacy, permission was sort from the kid to accept the mother as friend, well the answer I got was pretty cool but the events that happen soon after wasn't that cool at all. I was accused of poking my nose into personal issues and updating the mum in terms of the work performances. Even the choice of words like" BGR, Wack, Fight, etc" were misquoted and soon became a matter of word definition. It causes me much stress as all I wanted was to give someone a 2nd chance and help, I never wanted to be a saint. Perhaps, I wasn't ready for the tons of lies that follows and also my training in reading body languages and interrogations made things worst as I do see thru the lies. It was a struggle to continue to be the kind, cool Uncle Soh or to be the fair and justice person.
Many had said that I was foolhardy in even trying to help as such people don't deserve it as they don't even wanna help themselves in the first place and I have no place to try to butt in, course there are some that says that over the years despite my temper I still have a soft spot in helping others. Now it's even worst after my long hospital stay as I have tone down my temper and thus my mild nature had made me more vulnerable to literally helping anyone that comes my way. Come to think of it, it's rather true and this old pal of mine was spot on cause nowadays I even paid attention to stray cats and dogs and had the urge to help them too despite protest from my wifey and I had secretly visited SPCA without her knowledge.
On second thoughts, was I trying to relive the joy of mentoring and teaching kids the right way in this incident? Moudling the future of mankind? Sounds so saintly huh, well that was what drove me to apply to be a teacher more than a decade ago before I joined SPH, it was my ex-principal's words during the interview that made me gave up the idea totally. She said to me: " Andrew, you won't find the joy that you are looking for even if you think that you are doing the right thing cause to change others, you have to start with yourself." Wise words from a principal that I spend much of my JC days in her office.
I guess after my fight with my medical condition, it made me cherish life even more and it's not just about mine but the world at large. I believe strongly that people's path cross due to fate and some other unexplained reasons, well whether it is as some religions explained that it's unfinished business between two parties or karma. My take is that why not help if you can, religion or no religion. Somehow it's my way of life. I had made peace with the injustice and unfairness in my life and accepted the full reset of my life at this point in time by the higher powers, so to me it makes sense for me to rechart my life with a new direction and course.
Anyway, in conclusion is that some things just ain't within our control and turn out in the way we wanted it to be, perhaps our intention to help is just a wishful thinking on our part only. We can only do so much and if we have done our best, we can certainly walk away with our heads held high and move on to the next case. So my friends, the question above remains in this case, do you want to be the help or be the helper?
Till next time, cheers and good luck all.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
A Tribute to My Wife
I had wanted to write this tribute to my wife for the longest time but a recent incident and experience by my friends - Josh and Cat set my resolve to get this started. Thank you to you both but my biggest best wishes to both of you to stay strong and in good faith - never give up.
I met my wife - Adeline when she was a junior staff at SPH and I was a rookie Circulation Rep more than a decade ago. We started connecting thru sports activities cause as a rookie, you are always arrowed to take part in such departmental competitions, so thru such activities our relationship blossomed. Day by day, with the fetching and sending to and fro work and also for her part time studies in MIS at Clementi, it finally became time for us to tie the knot and like many typical Singaporeans, we applied for a HDB flat in Punggol but she was very against it as Punggol was undeveloped then. So it was a resale flat in Tampines as our first choice of a flat in McNair Rd was too expensive. To be frank, we wasn't well off then nonetheless we got our present flat at $358K with a mere $6K COV and there were minimal reno needed. In fact, we didn't even take any housing loan for fear of burdening ourselves with the repayment. So we repainted, rewired, washed the flat and with some new furnitures like the bed and cabinets and some essential appliances, we finally moved in. I still remembered that the appliances were actaully reject items from LG thru referral from a fellow colleague, it was a real bargain and boy, those appliances are still serving us well till now. Wifey was very skeptical then, lolz.
During the planning and purchasing process, wifey and I often fought and had differences in opinions and often our ex-colleague and pal - Jennifer was always sandwiched in between. Even so when we were planning for our wedding. I remembered vividly our wedding and honeymoon very much as I was teaching driving like close to 35hrs per week just to save enough for our wedding expenses and honeymoon. During those times, Ad was very understanding and she didn't grumble that I didn't spend enough time with her as my lessons were literally everyday. Well, she did contribute her fair share with her mahjong earnings too (haha).
Eventually, we managed to scrape thru with a banquet of over 40plus tables at Mandarin Hotel and a honeymoon in London and Paris. However the last leg of the return trip was disatrous cause the return airticket from Bangkok to Singapore had a wrong date. We waited in the airport for more than 15 hrs, with a swollen foot, Ad was ever so consoling and stick by me all the way. In the end, we managed to catch the last flight back to SIN and our very first Business Class flight. What a way to end a honeymoon huh.
Throughout the years, Ad had been a busy working wife with her event management duties with SPH and it can get crazy over weekends and I tried my best to be her driver and helper during those days. Grumble I did but it was fun too helping alongside with her and that's why I fell in love with not only my wife more but also with event management that change my future career path. Despite all the bad over my ten years in SPH and bad mouthing by other colleagues and even supervisors at work, I must really hand it to Ad, she was never affected and even stood by me even more as she believed in me totally. So when our kiddo - Ashton was born, she supported my decision to leave SPH and venture out. Many called me nutz! as I forego a almost 5 figure bonus and went on to something new.
I guess having her support and Ashton spur me on more, I was depressed to leave SPH as the job has taught me many things, given me a loving wife, a diploma and degree but it is the routine which I will badly missed. The beauty of going to work with my wife and seeing her everyday at work. After leaving SPH, we didn't looked back and thru some of my ups and downs in my career, she stood by me with Ashton.
As a wife and mother, I always felt that she is very forgetful, too nice to others, not street smart and even over pampering our kiddo. But despite all these, she is still my lovely wife and that's what so simple about her. She doesn't do any cooking or housework thus that became my ECAs. Haha. As for Ashton, we have the luxury of him being taken care of my parents on weekdays and Ad's parents on weekends. Life was actually quite simple for us, whatever I don't do - like playing mahjong, watching soccer, eating veggies, loving chillis, controlling my temper, being nice to others, she does it better than me. Perhaps that's why I adore her so much. She completed me in her own little ways.
Our biggest test to our relationship started around the end of last year when I suffered a relapse of my LGL blood disorder condition. I had this condition for more than 12 years already eversince I joined SPH, we had talked about it then but had never thought the condition would worsen so suddenly. Despite all that, we faced it head on, the weekly blood transfusion, in and out of hospital and worrying of death. So when it was time for me to go for my bone marrow transplant, I immediately planned for the worst, being the pessimist that I am. The 1st attempt failed and mentally I was sufferring and lucky for me, my 2nd brother's marrow was a matched. During my 2 months stay in the hospital both she and mum took turns to visit me during lunch or dinner to at least kept me company, even when she wasn't there she would still call my room or sent me words of encouragement via SMS. I'm sorry that during those times of fustrations, I yelled at her but she always greeted me back with a smile.
I guessed, during those times, she had to learn many new things like taking care of the household bills, pay for the car maintenance, start to drive the car, doing the housework, taking care of Ashton and juggle between her work. She never grumbled, hard it was on her and I am damn proud of her to be able to accomplished all that out of her comfort zone. Till today though I still says that if she were my driving school student I would had vomitted blood, yet it nice to have her drive me around sometimes. Despite it all, she still refused to open a internet banking account lor.
Last year and this year had been trying times for us as we had made big changes and sacrifices. We had to digged into our savings to pay off my massive hospital bills, daily expenses, downgrade to a smaller car, quit my job, stayed indoor and frequent the hospital. Despite all these, it made our relationship stronger and also our love for each other thus we planned to have a 2nd child despite all circumstances. She probably ain't the perfect wife but she does it well in her own way and neither am I the perfect husband too. However, we do compliment each other especially when disciplining our son and tackling issues in our lives thus it made us stronger.
Currently, thanks to her support, I'm doing much better with my medical condition and have learnt to take on life in a new perspective with her help. She enthrusted me back with many of the duties but she still help out much more than before. I've also started working in a charity organisation though the remuneration aren't as good as before but we are much happier with the regular hours, simpler life and also a means for us to return back to the less fortunate in my line of work. So am I a better person now if you ask me, my answer is: My wife - Adeline will always be a better person than I am and I'm still trying to be as good as she is.
Life is full of ups and down and it makes it all worthwhile when you have a lifelong partner by your side all the way. For that, my dearest wife - Adeline, I love you just the way you are. Thanks for being my loving wife and our son's doting mother. We're so blessed to have you in our lives. :)
I met my wife - Adeline when she was a junior staff at SPH and I was a rookie Circulation Rep more than a decade ago. We started connecting thru sports activities cause as a rookie, you are always arrowed to take part in such departmental competitions, so thru such activities our relationship blossomed. Day by day, with the fetching and sending to and fro work and also for her part time studies in MIS at Clementi, it finally became time for us to tie the knot and like many typical Singaporeans, we applied for a HDB flat in Punggol but she was very against it as Punggol was undeveloped then. So it was a resale flat in Tampines as our first choice of a flat in McNair Rd was too expensive. To be frank, we wasn't well off then nonetheless we got our present flat at $358K with a mere $6K COV and there were minimal reno needed. In fact, we didn't even take any housing loan for fear of burdening ourselves with the repayment. So we repainted, rewired, washed the flat and with some new furnitures like the bed and cabinets and some essential appliances, we finally moved in. I still remembered that the appliances were actaully reject items from LG thru referral from a fellow colleague, it was a real bargain and boy, those appliances are still serving us well till now. Wifey was very skeptical then, lolz.
During the planning and purchasing process, wifey and I often fought and had differences in opinions and often our ex-colleague and pal - Jennifer was always sandwiched in between. Even so when we were planning for our wedding. I remembered vividly our wedding and honeymoon very much as I was teaching driving like close to 35hrs per week just to save enough for our wedding expenses and honeymoon. During those times, Ad was very understanding and she didn't grumble that I didn't spend enough time with her as my lessons were literally everyday. Well, she did contribute her fair share with her mahjong earnings too (haha).
Eventually, we managed to scrape thru with a banquet of over 40plus tables at Mandarin Hotel and a honeymoon in London and Paris. However the last leg of the return trip was disatrous cause the return airticket from Bangkok to Singapore had a wrong date. We waited in the airport for more than 15 hrs, with a swollen foot, Ad was ever so consoling and stick by me all the way. In the end, we managed to catch the last flight back to SIN and our very first Business Class flight. What a way to end a honeymoon huh.
Throughout the years, Ad had been a busy working wife with her event management duties with SPH and it can get crazy over weekends and I tried my best to be her driver and helper during those days. Grumble I did but it was fun too helping alongside with her and that's why I fell in love with not only my wife more but also with event management that change my future career path. Despite all the bad over my ten years in SPH and bad mouthing by other colleagues and even supervisors at work, I must really hand it to Ad, she was never affected and even stood by me even more as she believed in me totally. So when our kiddo - Ashton was born, she supported my decision to leave SPH and venture out. Many called me nutz! as I forego a almost 5 figure bonus and went on to something new.
I guess having her support and Ashton spur me on more, I was depressed to leave SPH as the job has taught me many things, given me a loving wife, a diploma and degree but it is the routine which I will badly missed. The beauty of going to work with my wife and seeing her everyday at work. After leaving SPH, we didn't looked back and thru some of my ups and downs in my career, she stood by me with Ashton.
As a wife and mother, I always felt that she is very forgetful, too nice to others, not street smart and even over pampering our kiddo. But despite all these, she is still my lovely wife and that's what so simple about her. She doesn't do any cooking or housework thus that became my ECAs. Haha. As for Ashton, we have the luxury of him being taken care of my parents on weekdays and Ad's parents on weekends. Life was actually quite simple for us, whatever I don't do - like playing mahjong, watching soccer, eating veggies, loving chillis, controlling my temper, being nice to others, she does it better than me. Perhaps that's why I adore her so much. She completed me in her own little ways.
Our biggest test to our relationship started around the end of last year when I suffered a relapse of my LGL blood disorder condition. I had this condition for more than 12 years already eversince I joined SPH, we had talked about it then but had never thought the condition would worsen so suddenly. Despite all that, we faced it head on, the weekly blood transfusion, in and out of hospital and worrying of death. So when it was time for me to go for my bone marrow transplant, I immediately planned for the worst, being the pessimist that I am. The 1st attempt failed and mentally I was sufferring and lucky for me, my 2nd brother's marrow was a matched. During my 2 months stay in the hospital both she and mum took turns to visit me during lunch or dinner to at least kept me company, even when she wasn't there she would still call my room or sent me words of encouragement via SMS. I'm sorry that during those times of fustrations, I yelled at her but she always greeted me back with a smile.
I guessed, during those times, she had to learn many new things like taking care of the household bills, pay for the car maintenance, start to drive the car, doing the housework, taking care of Ashton and juggle between her work. She never grumbled, hard it was on her and I am damn proud of her to be able to accomplished all that out of her comfort zone. Till today though I still says that if she were my driving school student I would had vomitted blood, yet it nice to have her drive me around sometimes. Despite it all, she still refused to open a internet banking account lor.
Last year and this year had been trying times for us as we had made big changes and sacrifices. We had to digged into our savings to pay off my massive hospital bills, daily expenses, downgrade to a smaller car, quit my job, stayed indoor and frequent the hospital. Despite all these, it made our relationship stronger and also our love for each other thus we planned to have a 2nd child despite all circumstances. She probably ain't the perfect wife but she does it well in her own way and neither am I the perfect husband too. However, we do compliment each other especially when disciplining our son and tackling issues in our lives thus it made us stronger.
Currently, thanks to her support, I'm doing much better with my medical condition and have learnt to take on life in a new perspective with her help. She enthrusted me back with many of the duties but she still help out much more than before. I've also started working in a charity organisation though the remuneration aren't as good as before but we are much happier with the regular hours, simpler life and also a means for us to return back to the less fortunate in my line of work. So am I a better person now if you ask me, my answer is: My wife - Adeline will always be a better person than I am and I'm still trying to be as good as she is.
Life is full of ups and down and it makes it all worthwhile when you have a lifelong partner by your side all the way. For that, my dearest wife - Adeline, I love you just the way you are. Thanks for being my loving wife and our son's doting mother. We're so blessed to have you in our lives. :)
Friday, July 8, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Day 100 Finally!
I finally made it to day 100 after my Bone Marrow Transplant! According to my doctor, my body is supposingly now on the fast track now to recovery and all blood figures will be on the up trend. But am I really improving that much? I'm having major doubts cause I'm still struggling to stay on top of things and only I know it best.
Am I having a mid life crisis to say such things or am I just afraid of handling the truth? I'm not sure, no one knows it better except for myself I suppose. I have no problem falling asleep but I will wake up at around 5-6am every morning for no reason and fall back to sleep before being waken up by my wifey at 7.15am. Is that quality sleep, I'm not sure but once I reach the train station after dropping off my wifey and kid, I felt so alone and sometimes panicky, flushness of my face and cold sweats do occurs even light headedness. My insecurity, again I'm not sure, tried chatting on FB or chanting or looking at the people around me to take my mind off, well occasionally it does help. That is why going to work for me is a struggle and challenge and making it to work eventually is a blessing and greatful too.
Sometimes I felt so alone, it seems as days go by, people around me has forgotten about my problems and situations even my family members, daily I'm still finding an equilibriums of things, trying to pay the bills on time, etc, etc. Is it that they really thought that I have recovered fully or they felt that it's better not to talk about it. Many friends had claimed to be concerned but after awhile they are disappeared, worst are those that didn't even bother to call when heard about it. I had thought of crossing these people off from my list but what's the point? Life is too short to do such silly stuff lor. Am I asking too much from others in the first place?
So what's really in store for me in the future? Will I still enjoy a fruitful life for whatever that is still left? Many questions, many answers needed but will I ever get my questions answered in this lifetime, no one knows. So as the saying goes "Life still goes on". To me everyday I'm alive is a day earned and cherish. So to all out there - Seize The Day!
Am I having a mid life crisis to say such things or am I just afraid of handling the truth? I'm not sure, no one knows it better except for myself I suppose. I have no problem falling asleep but I will wake up at around 5-6am every morning for no reason and fall back to sleep before being waken up by my wifey at 7.15am. Is that quality sleep, I'm not sure but once I reach the train station after dropping off my wifey and kid, I felt so alone and sometimes panicky, flushness of my face and cold sweats do occurs even light headedness. My insecurity, again I'm not sure, tried chatting on FB or chanting or looking at the people around me to take my mind off, well occasionally it does help. That is why going to work for me is a struggle and challenge and making it to work eventually is a blessing and greatful too.
Sometimes I felt so alone, it seems as days go by, people around me has forgotten about my problems and situations even my family members, daily I'm still finding an equilibriums of things, trying to pay the bills on time, etc, etc. Is it that they really thought that I have recovered fully or they felt that it's better not to talk about it. Many friends had claimed to be concerned but after awhile they are disappeared, worst are those that didn't even bother to call when heard about it. I had thought of crossing these people off from my list but what's the point? Life is too short to do such silly stuff lor. Am I asking too much from others in the first place?
So what's really in store for me in the future? Will I still enjoy a fruitful life for whatever that is still left? Many questions, many answers needed but will I ever get my questions answered in this lifetime, no one knows. So as the saying goes "Life still goes on". To me everyday I'm alive is a day earned and cherish. So to all out there - Seize The Day!
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Gloomy after the Sunshine
Had half a day of break from work yesterday afternoon and met up with wifey's relatives and friends to update them about my condition. It was a good lunch. Went to shop at Tampines Mall to kinda update my wardrobe since I have started working since last week. In the process rewarded my wifey with a new pair of shoes, not too expensive but believe she deserve a little gift after those tiring days of taking care of me during my treatment. In the evening, organised a kopi session with the bros from the Toyota Club and catch up with some bros on their latest happenings.
The first half of today seems to have many things that are unplanned or kinda surprising. An old pal from a part time job look me up for lunch and on the way to lunch bump into quite a few ex comrades or colleagues which I was quite repulsive to meet before but guess it wasn't as bad as it seems. Was I being too sensitive or have they moved on and made peace with it? Perhaps all this time, I was the only one that didn't let it go and move on eventhough I thought I did. I cared too much about what others think and will say. It was so nice to be able to catch up with them in person although a couple of them I was quite suspicious if they are genuine or not from their body language. Was I thinking too much?
My current job as a Marcom Manager in a non-profit / charity organisation serves as a new start for me to be reconnected back to the working world while at the same time helping others. Am I being heal in the process, I'm not sure but I do know its not just about me though. I'm doing the best that I can, not struggling at all. I'm sure I will find my calling in due time.
This week is PC Show 2011, last year this time, me and my team were all excited and pumped up for another record breaking sales week. It had always beern a personal challenge for the team to break our own sales records, event after event - that's our main driving, not forgetting the team spirit is always high and we had so much fun being there. It was tiring and stressful nonethelss, will I miss it this year like the other events, probably not, haha but what I will missed badly are the atmosphere and the team.
So for all the hardworking folks out there - Kambatae!!!
The first half of today seems to have many things that are unplanned or kinda surprising. An old pal from a part time job look me up for lunch and on the way to lunch bump into quite a few ex comrades or colleagues which I was quite repulsive to meet before but guess it wasn't as bad as it seems. Was I being too sensitive or have they moved on and made peace with it? Perhaps all this time, I was the only one that didn't let it go and move on eventhough I thought I did. I cared too much about what others think and will say. It was so nice to be able to catch up with them in person although a couple of them I was quite suspicious if they are genuine or not from their body language. Was I thinking too much?
My current job as a Marcom Manager in a non-profit / charity organisation serves as a new start for me to be reconnected back to the working world while at the same time helping others. Am I being heal in the process, I'm not sure but I do know its not just about me though. I'm doing the best that I can, not struggling at all. I'm sure I will find my calling in due time.
This week is PC Show 2011, last year this time, me and my team were all excited and pumped up for another record breaking sales week. It had always beern a personal challenge for the team to break our own sales records, event after event - that's our main driving, not forgetting the team spirit is always high and we had so much fun being there. It was tiring and stressful nonethelss, will I miss it this year like the other events, probably not, haha but what I will missed badly are the atmosphere and the team.
So for all the hardworking folks out there - Kambatae!!!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Day 87 and the Fiesty Princess - Charmaine
Counting down to 100days before reaching the safety zone. Yesterday went back to SGH Haematology Centre to pick up my expensive meds (20 Tabs for $800+) and that only lasts me for a week. While the pharmacy was still not opened, I made myself at home as usual, chatting with the nurses and some of the regular patients at the clinic. Thru one of them I learnt about a 4 year old cancer patient by the name of Charmaine (look for the fiesty princess in Google), her father divorced the mum when she got sick and now the mum supports her and the older brother on her own. Her only cure is in the US and will cost about S$250,000. So family and friends put up a website to raise funds for their daily expenses and also her treatment.
Seriously I really don't understand how is it not possible for medical expenses to be more affordable or at least humane. Why too are kids being made to suffer like this, needless to say why a good person that has done no evil in his lifetime? I too have a 5 year old boy and when I read that it really pains me.
Last month, I had to bring my kid to the polyclinic to get two lumps on his foot checked out though he is not in pain, we wanted to be sure. However the wait to even get registered was fustrating. And all the doc did was a quick examine and write a referral letter for KKH, it all took less than 15mins but the earlier waiting time took about 2 hrs. No wonder many old folks including my dad complains about going to the polyclinic. By the way, he and his kaki goes to the polyclinic as early as 6.30am to Q up for his regular diabetic checkups in order to get home before lunch. Is this what retirement life suppose to be? Come to think of it my weekly follow up at SGH also takes about half a day but that is because of the numerous blood tests that I have to go thru and the doctor needs to go for her rounds at the wards in the morning.
I'm not trying to sound more sympathetic towards the hospital docs versus the polyclinic's but after being hospitalised in the ward for about 2 months, I'm more aware of their daily life. But there are bad apples too which I did gave them a piece of my mind, sadly despite being weak and sick then.
Nonetheless are doctors nowadays going too much for a quick fix or are they losing their bedside manners? Perhaps you guys can share with me. So stay healthy and active always. Cheers.
Seriously I really don't understand how is it not possible for medical expenses to be more affordable or at least humane. Why too are kids being made to suffer like this, needless to say why a good person that has done no evil in his lifetime? I too have a 5 year old boy and when I read that it really pains me.
Last month, I had to bring my kid to the polyclinic to get two lumps on his foot checked out though he is not in pain, we wanted to be sure. However the wait to even get registered was fustrating. And all the doc did was a quick examine and write a referral letter for KKH, it all took less than 15mins but the earlier waiting time took about 2 hrs. No wonder many old folks including my dad complains about going to the polyclinic. By the way, he and his kaki goes to the polyclinic as early as 6.30am to Q up for his regular diabetic checkups in order to get home before lunch. Is this what retirement life suppose to be? Come to think of it my weekly follow up at SGH also takes about half a day but that is because of the numerous blood tests that I have to go thru and the doctor needs to go for her rounds at the wards in the morning.
I'm not trying to sound more sympathetic towards the hospital docs versus the polyclinic's but after being hospitalised in the ward for about 2 months, I'm more aware of their daily life. But there are bad apples too which I did gave them a piece of my mind, sadly despite being weak and sick then.
Nonetheless are doctors nowadays going too much for a quick fix or are they losing their bedside manners? Perhaps you guys can share with me. So stay healthy and active always. Cheers.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
The Story Continues.....
During the whole ordeal, I'm greatly thankful to many bros, folks and people that had offered their help to me either physically, financially and spiritually. Though many who know me knows that I'm a free thinker but I had taken all these advices in stride and read some of the literatures given to me with greatfulness. One book given to me by Christopher called "Awaken Your Healing Power" was a real inspiration to me during my recovering days at home and I was moved to tears by some of its contents. I will strongly recommend it to everyone.
Many had told me that it wasn't easy to go thru what I had to but the road to recovery is still a long way to go. Some of my meds are to taken for years while follow-up check ups will still be frequent and forgetting that the constant fear of an virus attack to my body is still imminent.It will take time but I also know very well that the worst of it is far from over it. Like everyone, I just have to continue to stay focus, positive, strong and stress free to deal with whatever comes my way.
One thought that still lingers at this moment in time with me and my wife is that should we be considering having another baby. Will he inherit my illness and get deformity due to the meds that I'm taking or etc etc??? Financially its gonna be a stretch to have another kid at this point in time but if we don't do it then it will be too lonely for our 5 year old son. Well we just have to think of a way.
With each day, we looked forward to and hope for the best and manage to our best abilities at this point in time. The clock is ticking ......... And so may the force be with us.
Many had told me that it wasn't easy to go thru what I had to but the road to recovery is still a long way to go. Some of my meds are to taken for years while follow-up check ups will still be frequent and forgetting that the constant fear of an virus attack to my body is still imminent.It will take time but I also know very well that the worst of it is far from over it. Like everyone, I just have to continue to stay focus, positive, strong and stress free to deal with whatever comes my way.
One thought that still lingers at this moment in time with me and my wife is that should we be considering having another baby. Will he inherit my illness and get deformity due to the meds that I'm taking or etc etc??? Financially its gonna be a stretch to have another kid at this point in time but if we don't do it then it will be too lonely for our 5 year old son. Well we just have to think of a way.
With each day, we looked forward to and hope for the best and manage to our best abilities at this point in time. The clock is ticking ......... And so may the force be with us.
Friday, June 3, 2011
It's been too long and too much
It's been a long while since I blogged and many things had happened with some turning for the worst. I have since been diagnose with Sever Aplastic Anemia and gone thru a Bone Marrow Transplant. It was a very harrowing experience for me and my family.
I couldn't accept th efact of my diagnosis initially but as even seeking 2nd opinion also proved the same thus we had no choice but to accept it. I spent almost 2 months in an isolated hospital room and what follows were endless follow up appointments, blood tests, medicines and hospital bills. It was a real torture especially those days when I was warded, it was like I'm in a prison. Sleep deprivation and lost of taste were driving me nuts, not forgetting the lack of contacts with friends and family.. I missed home terribly, the pain from the IVs needles, meds, chemo were all taking their toll on me. Luckily, I started improving and managed to convince my doc for an early discharge.
Frankly, I was thankful to friends like Carren, who brought me Macdonald's, kueh kueh, etc to quest my cravings and especially my mum who came and visit me with lunch everyday. Her soups and home cooked food helped in my recovery too.
After discharge, I was very much handicapped at home as I'm supposed to stay indoors in a viral free environment. My mum continued to bring me homecooked meals during lunch and dinner. It was very tiring for her, I felt really bad about it.
Thanks to Esther and her hubby Roy, my weekly visit to SGH for my follow up was more convenient and I found myself becoming a mama boy once again as my mum would accompany me for such visit. I would have to spend at least half day each time at the hospital.
My wife and I were very concerned about the expenses and previous hospitalisation bills. We were referred to the Medical Social Services but we weren't confident that we will get much support so we bite the bullet and many relatives and friends did offered to help finanicially. We managed to scrape thru with the $40,000 hospital bill and are still struggling with our daily finances and the weekly medical bill of about $250.
Well got to end here now, cause work beckons. The fight continues.
I couldn't accept th efact of my diagnosis initially but as even seeking 2nd opinion also proved the same thus we had no choice but to accept it. I spent almost 2 months in an isolated hospital room and what follows were endless follow up appointments, blood tests, medicines and hospital bills. It was a real torture especially those days when I was warded, it was like I'm in a prison. Sleep deprivation and lost of taste were driving me nuts, not forgetting the lack of contacts with friends and family.. I missed home terribly, the pain from the IVs needles, meds, chemo were all taking their toll on me. Luckily, I started improving and managed to convince my doc for an early discharge.
Frankly, I was thankful to friends like Carren, who brought me Macdonald's, kueh kueh, etc to quest my cravings and especially my mum who came and visit me with lunch everyday. Her soups and home cooked food helped in my recovery too.
After discharge, I was very much handicapped at home as I'm supposed to stay indoors in a viral free environment. My mum continued to bring me homecooked meals during lunch and dinner. It was very tiring for her, I felt really bad about it.
Thanks to Esther and her hubby Roy, my weekly visit to SGH for my follow up was more convenient and I found myself becoming a mama boy once again as my mum would accompany me for such visit. I would have to spend at least half day each time at the hospital.
My wife and I were very concerned about the expenses and previous hospitalisation bills. We were referred to the Medical Social Services but we weren't confident that we will get much support so we bite the bullet and many relatives and friends did offered to help finanicially. We managed to scrape thru with the $40,000 hospital bill and are still struggling with our daily finances and the weekly medical bill of about $250.
Well got to end here now, cause work beckons. The fight continues.
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